If you’re a gamer over the age of 25, there’s a good chance that you’ve played at least one of the Contra games for the NES, SNES, or the Sega Genesis. It’s a legendary series known for being impossibly hard to beat. Created by Konami, it’s one of the franchises that made U-U-D-D-L-R-L-R-B-A famous.

And while Konami isn’t actually handling development on the franchise any more, it’s still very much alive. In fact, there’s a brand new entry in the series called Hard Corps: Uprising. It’s out on Xbox Live Arcade now and coming to PSN later this year. Created by Arc System Works (of Guilty Gear and BlazBlue fame), it serves as a prequel to 1994′s Contra: Hard Corps for the Sega Genesis. And it’s just as goddamn hard.

Seriously, this is one of the hardest platform shooters that I’ve ever played. It’s as close to a bullet hell shooter as a game can get without actually being called a bullet hell shooter. And yet I keep playing, despite spending more time on my back than a prostitute.

Aside from a bit too much emphasis on the anime art style (at least for my taste), this game has all of the charm that make Contra games so much fun. And fortunately, ASW included an accessible new Rising mode for players who don’t want to experience the ass-hammering that is the purist Arcade mode. Rising mode adds a whole new level of addiction to the mix, too, because of its points system that allows you to continuously level up your character.

My only real gripe about the game at this point is that some of the checkpoints are spaced just a bit too far apart. I found myself rage-quitting several times after being slapped with absolutely cheap bullshit at the last second. But hey, that’s Contra for you.